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Re: Asking a guy to dance
Posted by dgcasey
7/6/2006  11:10:00 AM
I asked several ladies to dance with me. I kept asking, and I kept polite. It took two and a half hours to get a yes response

Two and a half hours?!!

What the heck is wrong with the ladies at that studio? (Notice how I avoided asking what's wrong with you? )

I've only been dancing since Thanksgiving, but I can only remember being turned down for a dance one time in that whole time. And she came up and asked me to dance a couple of dances later. It turned out she didn't know anything about ChaCha, but didn't want to admit that. We've danced many times since then.

I think one of the reasons I get asked to dance a lot is because, 1) I've gotten a reputation of being a decent dancer, not great but decent, and 2) I get dressed up to go out dancing. I walk into the studio dressed in a minimum of a dress shirt and tie, sometimes a full suit. Not only have I figured out that ladies love to dance, they also love to dance with a guy that looks like he took more than five minutes getting ready to go out that evening.

But, two and half hours? Are you kidding me? I'd find a new place to dance if that were the case for me.
Re: Asking a guy to dance
Posted by Serendipidy
4/18/2008  6:17:00 PM
I'll add my bit to this. Where I live at a social dance, or a teaching class there is always played a Progresive Dance at the beginning of the evening where every few bars usually eight the lady moves on to the next partner. These Progressive dances can be and usually are Foxtrot Tempo. Jive or Cha Cha. They are all set pieces which everybody here know. The idea is to get everybody to meet each other early in the evening, usually to get the ball rolling.. They go under the name of Progrssive Jive or Cha . Samba. The Foxtrot Tempo have the names The Stroll. The Barn Dance ( this is the best known and the most often played of all ). There are many others. I just picked the most danced. It is esentuall for these dances where we change partners every eight bars that the music is eight bar phrased with a four bar introduction.
This has an added bonus. At a very early age we know what is meant by phrasing , without it we would find it awkward changing partners in a Progressive Dance. Not often but it has happend a disk that is not phrased correctly is put on. Everybody will stop and look to the music person who will quickly appologise and put another disk on.
Re: Asking a guy to dance
Posted by Rita_Gwen
2/6/2006  3:57:00 PM
Thank you for your answers, guys. It helps. I have some problems in this area - I'm rarely been asked to dance, and i know at least two reasons - first, I'm tall (5'11") and this may confuse some people, and second, I still know very little of smooth dances and have to sit them out. So I was thinking if it is OK to ask people for dances i know well (most of the Latin and Rhythm).
Re: Asking a guy to dance
Posted by doorknob
3/18/2006  7:02:00 AM
If you are more comfortable in some dances then yes ask guys for those. And if you decline one of the others be clear that you would be happy to dance something else.
Re: Asking a guy to dance
Posted by Quickstep
3/17/2006  10:43:00 PM
Rita Gwen. If the man is alone . That is not with a partner or girl friend. Then why not ask. It is probably better if you know he can or cannot dance before you make your way across the floor. In recent years it seems to have dropped off here, but there was always a number of Ladies invitation Dances as well as an Excuse me Dance where men or ladies could cut in whilst the dance was in progress. Best of luck
Re: Asking a guy to dance
Posted by JimInBuffalo
3/22/2006  4:45:00 PM
Rita, My understanding, and from what I have observed in most social situations locally, is that it is most acceptable for a lady to ask a man to dance. From the practical side, most dances that I go to have far fewer men than women. If you are a single woman at a dance then you need to ask or you will be waiting a long time to get a dance in. This is the biggest complaint that I hear from ladies in our area. I have discussed this with other guys and we are very flattered by an invitation to dance. I never look at it as anything beyond a social dance and it is very good for leaders or followers to dance with new partners to hone their skills. I spoke to a lady who is taking lessons from a chain studio (AM) and her biggest fear right now is that she cannot dance with anyone except her instructor. I told her to get out to the local dances and ask as many men as possible to dance with her.
My contention is: if you learn the steps and practice on a regular basis then you should be able to dance with anyone else who is at the same level of instruction.

Please if you are out and there is an available man, ask him to dance, you won't regret it. -Jim
Re: Asking a guy to dance
Posted by Foxtrotter52
4/26/2006  5:25:00 PM
I usually ask the ladies to dance, but if a lady asks me to dance I will always accept their invitation. I love to dance and am flattered when someone asks me to dance. Women should ask men to dance, sometimes guys get a little nervous and won't ask.
Re: Asking a guy to dance
Posted by Jim
4/26/2006  7:51:00 PM
My social dance buddy is a very accomplished dancer and she is very aggressive socially. She will ask anyone to dance, especially if she feels that they are a good dancer. She very seldom gets rejected. All the guys seem to like dancing with her.

It helps if a lady can dance when asking a guy to dance. Most guys, including myself welcome ladies to ask us to dance.

Most beginners are a little overwhelmed and shy when they first start dancing, but as their skills increase--they get less timid.

Re: Asking a guy to dance
Posted by darcy
7/1/2006  4:14:00 PM
Don't worry just ask!

Of course I'll dance with you!
Re: Asking a guy to dance
Posted by Lol
9/16/2007  2:45:00 PM
Lol that was hilarious

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